The Cruel World Read online

  His cheeks turn bright red. “Don’t say that.”

  I flinch at the harshness of his voice.

  “I’ve never seen you as a sister.” He rubs a hand at his chest, like what I said hurt him physically.

  “I’m sorry.” My voice breaks. “Ian, I hate this. I don’t want you to be mad at me. What can I do to make things better?”

  “You can’t.” He pauses, turning to look at me. “Actually, yes. You can make it better.”

  “How?” I’ll do literally anything to make Ian like me again.

  “You can leave the team,” he says harshly.

  I suck in a sharp breath. “W-wha-what?”

  He shrugs. “You asked. I’m just telling you what you can do.”

  I look at him with my mouth open, wondering how I’m supposed to respond.

  Even now, four months after joining The Royals, Ian is still trying to get me to leave the team.

  He looks at me, waiting for me to say something.

  I take a deep breath. “Look, Ian, I care a lot about you, but I’m not leaving this team. These guys and you have become like family to me. I meant it when I said it. No matter how much you bully me and ignore me, I’m not going anywhere. So you might as well get used to me.”

  He grunts, standing up from the chair. He turns to open the door but pauses and turns back to look at me.

  “Game on, Roxy.”

  He opens the door and shuts it hard behind him. I flinch at the sound, but I don’t get up to walk inside yet.

  I have no idea what I’m going to do, but I do know I’m not leaving. I meant what I told Ian—he can bully me and hate me, but this is where I belong.

  Roxy Villareal might look like a ‘Princess,’ at least according to West Newman, but she definitely doesn’t act like one. I’m stronger than they think, and they won’t break me.

  Monday, December 11

  Welcome to The Island.

  On Monday morning, we pile into the Jeep to head to The Royal Games. I’m surprised when we don’t head in the direction of the airport. In fact, we don’t head toward the interstate at all. We head south, and I’m too scared to ask questions about where we’re going.

  West is in a grumpy mood, though that’s every day lately. Part of me wants to scream at him and demand to know what his problem is with me, but the other part of me is scared to know what his answer would be. I’m terrified that West knows how I really feel about him and that he’s only being mean to me to help me get over my crush on him. I would be crushed and mortified if that were the case.

  Ian sits in the front seat, next to West. It’s something he’s never done until after what happened in St. Thomas—now he can’t stand to sit beside me. Yesterday just solidified that.

  I am in the middle in the back seat, between Kal and Alek. The two of them seemed really mad at me on Saturday and most of Sunday, but neither seem mad at me any longer. They’re acting like they always have.

  Last night, Kal sat on my bed beside me and we watched a movie together on my laptop. It felt like old times and he acted like Saturday never happened, like he was never mad at me. I just don’t know what to think of it, but I am grateful.

  We cross over a causeway and onto an island. When I see guards and a secured fence around the island, I wonder what kind of island this is. And then I see the name of the town is literally The Island. In fact, there is a huge sign that says, ‘Welcome to The Island.’

  I give Kal a questioning look.

  “The Island is, obviously, owned by Spy School,” he explains.

  “How many islands does Spy School own?” I ask.

  He shrugs, rubbing a hand at the back of his neck. “I don’t know. Probably a lot. But The Island is special.”

  “Special how?”

  West’s eyes meet mine in the rearview mirror. “Retired Spy School agents live here. Usually it’s younger agents who have a family—people who retire for their kids. The school here trains all the students a lot like Spy School does. Even if the kids don’t want to be agents, it’s dangerous to live in a town with a bunch of retired Spy School agents, so they all kind of protect one another.”

  I raise an eyebrow. “Why would anybody ever want to retire from Spy School?”

  Alek, Kal, and West all laugh.

  “Exactly.” Alek shakes his head. “What a waste of training.”

  “Then again, Spy School isn’t everybody’s whole life,” Kal says. “Like my parents. They’ve been considering retiring.”

  Alek looks around me to Kal. “I didn’t know that.”

  Kal shrugs. “My mom is pregnant. She’s calling it her miracle baby. Or babies, I guess. It’s twins.”

  My eyes widen. “Wow. Twins.”

  RIP sleepless nights. Twins sound like a lot of work.

  “Yep…” Kal looks out the window, and I wonder what he’s thinking.

  The Island is bursting with people—the streets are crowded with people walking around on foot, looking around the shops in town. I notice a coffee shop which I most definitely will be hitting up later.

  “So everybody is Spy School agents?” I ask, just to make sure.

  “Yep. Or the kid of a Spy School agent,” Alek answers.

  “What happens if the kid decides not to continue on with Spy School as an adult?”

  “They get kicked off The Island.” West gives me a look that says the answer should be obvious.

  I can’t imagine being raised on The Island and then being kicked out as an adult just because I didn’t want to be a Spy School agent. Being forced to leave your hometown, whether you wanted to or not? It’s so horrible.

  What would it be like to be ‘normal?’ I cringe at the thought. Normal sounds so… boring. I can’t relate to anybody wanting to retire from Spy School, at least not until I’m super old—not that there are a lot of really old people who retire from Spy School. A lot of agents end up getting killed at some point. It’s a dangerous job.

  Glancing out the window, I see a group of teenagers walking together down the sidewalk. They don’t look that much younger than me, maybe seventeen-years-old. I wonder if they grew up here. Well, they had to have grown up here. My team is the youngest Royal team currently. Next year, Michael Sinclair will probably form a new group, if he thinks anybody is worthy enough to lead a team on The Royals. There was a four-year span when Michael didn’t invite anybody to be a Royal, that happens sometimes.

  I glance at West, my eyes opening wide. “Wait, do the people in this town know about The Royals? Since there are Royal Games?”

  West nods, not giving me any further explanation.

  I look to Kal, hoping he will answer.

  “A lot of the agents on The Island are Royals. There are a few exceptions, but only with people Michael Sinclair truly trusts,” Kal explains.

  “Royals are allowed to retire? I mean, of course they’re allowed to, but who would want to?” I chew on my lip, shaking my head.

  The Royals is a hard group to get into—only the best are allowed in. As a Royal, you get to make a real difference. I can’t understand why anybody would give that up.

  Kal pats my head. “You’re cute, Roxy.”

  I shrug his hand off, glaring at him. “And you’re a pain in the butt, Kal.”

  Alek snickers.

  “No fighting,” West says, as he pulls the Jeep into a house on the beach.

  “Is this where we’re staying?” I ask, sitting up straighter.

  “Nice, isn’t it?” Kal opens the door.

  “Wait before you get out,” West demands. “All of us need to have a conversation.”

  Kal shuts his door and silence falls over the car as we all turn our attention to our leader.

  West turns in his seat and he looks at each of us, his eyes landing on me last. My stomach tightens with anxiety as I wait for him to give whatever speech he’s about to give. I don’t think this is going to be a good thing.

  “Michael Sinclair is going to be here this week.” He p
auses. “And we’re going to be interacting with him a lot. Tonight, he wants to go to dinner with us.”

  I swallow hard.

  It’s obvious what West is going to say next.

  “We’ve all taken acting classes. And tonight, we have to put on a performance.” West gives Ian a pointed look. “I know we don’t all like each other, but we have to pretend like we’re the best of friends and that everything is perfect within our team. If we don’t, we’re liable to end up in a situation like we were in California again.”

  None of us want that, especially not Ian. I don’t think he could handle being in a situation where he had to trust me right now. That would be a true disaster.

  I lick my lips, which are suddenly dry. “I don’t have a problem with anybody in this car, so I won’t have to act.”

  Ian grunts. “I’m a really good actor. Michael Sinclair won’t know how I feel.”

  His words are like a knife to the gut, but it’s what I expected.

  Kal grabs onto my hand, squeezing it. I know he’s trying to comfort me, but I still have to blink back the tears.

  “No snarky comments like that tonight.” West glares at Ian.

  I’m surprised he’s taking my side for once, but it doesn’t seem to do any good. Ian just shrugs at West.

  “Can we get out now?” Ian asks.

  West nods once and Ian opens the door, jumping out of the Jeep like it’s on fire. Alek follows him, not quite as hastily, and Kal gives me a smile before he gets out too. West hasn’t moved to get out yet, so I meet his eyes in the rearview mirror.

  “Are you okay?” he asks.

  “I’ll be okay.” At least, I hope I’ll be okay.

  “If you need to talk, I’m here,” West says.

  I push a piece of hair behind my ear. “Thanks.”

  I’m surprised West is saying that, but I’m glad I have him if I need him.

  “I’m your leader. It’s my job to be here for you,” he says, completely ruining what he said earlier.

  Of course he’s not here for me because he wants to be. He’s here for me because he has to be. I have to remember that West Newman doesn’t like me—he tolerates me because he has to.

  I climb out of the Jeep after Kal, who is carrying my bag for me.

  This week is going to be a challenge—I hope we don’t end up killing one another.

  Performance of a lifetime.

  The house that we’re staying at is on the beach. It’s a quaint two story home with four bedrooms and three bathrooms. For once, I don’t have to share a room, and it’s wonderful.

  I’m not sure what is going on with West since the car earlier, but he’s decided to be nice to me. He’s given me the master bedroom, the only room with a bathroom attached to it. I’m not quite sure what to think—maybe he’s had a change of heart. Or maybe he feels sorry for me because of the thing with Ian. Most likely, I think he’s just getting a head start on acting for tonight.

  Michael Sinclair is good—too good to fall for an act. I worry he is going to see right through us and he’s going to know that we’re phonies. He’s going to know that the woods did nothing to help us.

  Well, that’s not true. It did help for a little bit. I’m not sure what happened to make things go back to the way they were before, but I hate it.

  I look at myself in the mirror, running my hands over the front of my dress. It’s a bright red skater style dress. I don’t normally wear high heels, but tonight I am just because I want to look good. When Michael Sinclair invites your team to dinner, you dress to impress. I even took the time to curl my hair and put on makeup—something I rarely do.

  There is a knock on my door, so I walk over, opening it up. Alek is standing on the other side and he lets out a long whistle.

  “Wow.” His eyes scan me from my head to my toes. “Absolutely stunning, Roxy.”

  I grin shyly at him. “Thanks.”

  “West sent me to see if you’re, and I quote, ‘done being a girl because we’ve got to go.’” Alek shakes his head. “I think he’s going to regret saying that when he sees how incredible you look.”

  My cheeks grow warm. “I don’t know about that.”

  West will never see me as a girl—not really. He only sees me as a girl when it’s convenient. I think it’s easier for him to treat me like one of the guys. And part of me wants that. I want him to treat me like one of the guys… like I’m just an important part of the team. But the other part of me really wants him to see me as a girl. And I hate the part of me that hopes West thinks I look pretty tonight.

  I follow Alek out of my room and down the stairs to the main floor. West is standing by the front door, his back turned toward us. He has one hand on the doorknob, like he’s about to walk out and leave the rest of us here because he’s worried about being late. A quick glance at the time on my phone reveals that if we leave now, we’ll be early.

  Kal is sitting on the couch and he jumps up when he sees Alek and I walk down. When his eyes land on me, he lets out a long whistle.

  “What a knockout.” Kal motions at me.

  I put a hand to my chest. “Oh, me? I thought you were whistling at Alek.”

  Alek chuckles, pulling at his suit jacket. “I do look good.”

  West turns to look at us, but he barely even glances at me. “Let’s get going. We don’t want to be late.”

  My heart sinks.

  What did I expect? For West to call me beautiful?

  Ian, who I didn’t see before, storms past us and out the door. West follows him. I sigh, wondering how we ended up here.

  Kal motions me to go first. “After you, Roxy.”

  I smile at him, but it’s only half-hearted, and then I walk ahead after West and Ian. I hear Kal and Alek walking behind me. A knot forms in my throat, but I can’t cry tonight. I have to be strong and I have to put on the performance of a lifetime. We have to fool Michael Sinclair tonight, if that’s even possible, and going to dinner with my makeup smeared might be a giveaway that everything isn’t as perfect as it seems.

  Kal walks in front of me and opens the back door of the Jeep, motioning me inside. I look at him with a raised eyebrow and he shrugs.

  “Beautiful girls should always have their doors opened for them,” he says.

  I give him a genuine smile, glad that he said that. I needed that. If he didn’t say that I’m not sure I would’ve made it through the evening without bursting into tears.

  Once we’re all in the Jeep, West takes off without a word and we drive for a good five minutes before one word is spoken. It’s completely silent. And since Ian is in the front seat instead of Alek, there isn’t even any Russian rock music to distract us today.

  West clears his throat after a bit. “Don’t forget what I said earlier. I know that things aren’t great with us right now, but we will figure it out without the help of Michael Sinclair. I need him to think that everything is fine.”

  But everything isn’t fine.

  “Do you really think we can fool Michael Sinclair?” Kal asks.

  I’m sure it’s what everybody was thinking—how can we fool the director of Spy School? He’s way too smart to fall for any act that we will put on tonight.

  “I’ll worry about that.” West tightens his grip on the steering wheel. “You guys just do as I say.”

  “Yes, sir,” I mumble under my breath.

  Kal and Alek chuckle, obviously hearing me. West stays silent, so I know he didn’t hear or else he’d probably be yelling at me right now.

  “Just don’t let Roxy sit by me,” Ian says. “I can act, but I don’t want her anywhere near me.”

  I flinch at the harshness in his voice.

  Kal grabs onto my hand and squeezes it. “She can sit by me.”

  “She’s sitting by me,” West says, his voice tight. “Ian, if you mess this up, I will throw your computer into the ocean when we get home.”

  Ian’s face pales at that.

  Yeah, that’s one way to make sure Ia
n obeys tonight.

  West turns on his blinker and we pull into the back parking lot of a restaurant that sits right on the corner. The beach is so close—only one block away—so of course the restaurant is beach themed. The whole town is beach themed. And the place is conveniently called ‘Beachside Grill.’ Original.

  We climb out of the Jeep, and Kal puts his hand on the small of my back to comfort me. I smile at him to let him know I appreciate the gesture. Tonight, I need all the comfort I can get. I am so nervous.

  West walks closer, knocking off Kal’s hand. “No flirting with Roxy tonight. If Michael Sinclair thinks one of us is dating her, it would be a disaster.”

  I turn to glare at him. “He’s just being a friend to me, West.”

  West glares right back. “Well he can be a friend from a distance.”

  I roll my eyes.

  I will not drown West Newman in the ocean, I chant over and over again as we walk into the restaurant.

  Once inside, we are led to a private room in the back of the place. Michael isn’t here yet, but I do notice there are two extra places at the table, making me think somebody else will be joining us besides Michael. West must notice too because he eyes the seats cautiously.

  West puts me between him and Kal, and Alek sits across from me, with Ian beside him. Ian looks anywhere but at me, though I imagine that will change when Michael Sinclair walks in. He will put on a show.

  “This is awkward,” Kal says.

  I nod in agreement.

  “We can do this. We’ve all gotten along before, I know we can pretend to get along for a little bit.” West looks at Ian. “You and Roxy were best buddies. Certainly, you can stop treating her like she kicked your dog.”

  Ian grunts. “I suppose I can pretend to like her for a little bit.”

  West looks at me with a raised eyebrow.

  “I don’t have to pretend to like Ian. Despite how he feels, I do like him. I have no problem with him.” I glance over at Ian. His face is bright red.

  “What about me, Princess?” West smirks. “You going to pretend to like me.”